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For future reference.

Thank you.

For those who would ever need it. -C

reblogging here because i can see this being relevant to anyone who’s ever tried to get out of an abusive relationship

Reblogging because that last comment made me reread the whole thing in a new light and realize this could be vital information. So, putting it out there for everyone, and hoping no one ever really needs it.

(via gallifreyanturtles)

12 hours ago · 347,493 notes · originally from beben-eleben


found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom


found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom

(via bubblegumdefective)

16 hours ago · 139,682 notes · originally from crusherccme

Anonymous said, "ladies. i'm exhibiting symptoms of someone with depression. in march i was diag w/ anxiety. which hit me hard. made me feel bad about myself. guilty for having a MHP when my parents have given me the best childhood i could ask for. it first came on when i was 8, i'm 19 now. Therapy has been difficult and confusing and i have been so sad. I recently stopped therapy cause my anxiety has been so much better, and i felt so happy when i finished. i thought finally all this sadness would go (cont)"

(cont2) but recently the sadness has started creeping back in. i feel guilty again, why am i so sad when i have so many great things. i feel like i’ve let my parents down. i don’t want to tell them because i don’t want them to worry. but it’s coming back and it scares me because i don’t know what’s going to fix it. like no matter how many blankets i wrap round myself i will always be cold. it’s scaring me and i just want a big big hug

You’re okay, sweeetheart.

People with cancer don’t get cancer cause they’re bad people, they get cancer cause cancer happens. Similarly, people don’t get depression or other mental health problems because they’re bad people, or because they deserve it. It’s an illness, and you have it, and that’s just how it is unfortunately. :(

Therapy may be weird and tough, but I really believe that if you keep at it, things will get better. Even when it seems things are better (and they probably are), you still need to keep at it. Dealing with mental illness is a process of fighting and fighting and fighting- fighting to heal, fighting to live your life, fighting to be happy - but you can do it. It’s not impossible, I promise. It’ll be hard, it’ll suck balls and it’ll be painful and sad and terrible, but there is always a way to get back up and truck on, I promise. Keep going to therapy, get some medication, and fightfightfight. We’re all cheering for you, okay? <3

In the meantime, tell people. Tell your friends, tell your family, tell other counsellors and doctors, join a forum online or a group in real life. You need support, and people are there waiting to give it to you. You don’t have to do this alone, and remember that other people are going through fights with mental illness just like you. They’re fighting and fighting, and some of them aren’t doing so well, like you’re feeling. There’s a huge community out there that can help you, and your friends and family are there to support you and love you. Let them!

Sending you all our love,


20 hours ago · 1 note

Anonymous said, "(1)STORYTIME: (Again): I told you earlier about this adventure I had early in June (/post/87722261785/storytime-so-this-guy-ive-known-since-middle-school). Anyway, I was at a bar this Friday, and had every intention of brining Guy 2 from that time to bed with me and having a jolly good time. He had this long conversation with my friend (about me, that was). And according to her, he said that he wanted me, so bad, but he was afraid that I would get feelings for him. Which I understand, seeing as"

(2) four years ago I was so in love with him that I was practically writing my wedding wovs. Anyway, the night goes on. I’m talking to some friends. And suddenly I find out that he and I will dance. So we do. After he’s asking me about something (memory is a little fuzzy here), and I answer with “are you coming home with me tonight?” Ugh. No. He wasn’t. Since he’d just broken up with his girlfriend, and felt that it wasn’t such a good idea right now. And I tell him in my most seductive tone that

(3) I really wanted him. Right now. He keeps promising me that me and him, it will become a thing. “One day, it will be you and I, just not today”, and stuff like that. We’re working at the same museum this summer, and there’s still two more weeks, so plenty of time. Besides, he’s moving to my hometown, and staying there for two years – plenty of time. And I was like. WTF. Why not now? Obviously because of his anxiety for me getting feelings for him, right? My friend thinks that it’s the other

(4) way around. That he’s angsty about him getting feelings for me. And I’m like… okaaay? Or he could still be pissed out about June, which was a horrible idea, now that I see it in retrospect. Later that same night another friend of mine, who I’ve been starting to get a bit of a dislike on me came to talk to me. And her words were as follows: “You’ll not get him tonight, you know. You’ll probably never get him.” And I was like wtf. WHY DO I HAVE TOXIC FRIENDS? She then proceeded to tell me that

(5) to tell me that I should fuck the other guy that’s been onto me all night, because I’m single, and she’s not. And I told her that I don’t have sex with guys I’ve never talked to before. I should just forget that, just for one night, and just do it. And I was like. What the fuck are you doing in my life. Ugh. So the questions: 1) How should I now proceed with the guy? Because I know he wants me, he and I will always want each other, but I’m terrified that there will always be excuses. And 2)

(6) And 2) How do I get rid of a toxic friend, who is friends with all my other friends? Ugh. // Sorry about the long post, but you lot are the best people I know for answering these questions, and you’re always so understanding about my angsty life. I love this site and you moderators sososososo much!

Okay, six-parter. Wowie zowie. I don’t want to be a dick, but please don’t send 6-parters. It discourages us from answering quickly, and often it’s just too much info for what advice you need. That being said, answer under the cut.

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20 hours ago · 1 note

Anonymous said, "hey, i'm the anon who sent a question about not getting a period on BC, i just got it oh god DOING A HAPPY DANCE so relieved omg getting the period is the best thing on the entire planet (after sex)"

I felt bad for your worry, so I used my woman’s blog mod powers to punch your uterus on the ethereal plane so it would hurry up and start spitting blood.

- Kit

Anonymous said, "I'm on BC and me and my bf don't use condoms. I'm supposed to have a period now (pill-free week) but I don't. I usually get it on 2nd or 3rd day after I take the last pill of the pack (Saturday) and it's always been pretty regular and on time for me. I took all of the pills on time with 1-3hr difference max. As far as I know there is very little chance I'm pregnant but I'm still very anxious and paranoid. Do you have any tips/advice on how to deal with this?"

Why don’t you take, I don’t know, some kind of widely available hormone litmus test that can cost as little as $1 and takes less than 5 minutes to do and get an accurate reading?

Oh yeah, that’s a pregnancy test.

Wow. That zipped that right up. Case closed, court adjourned, bring out the dancing lobsters.

- Kit

Anonymous said, "My cramps are so bad right now and I took medicine and it's not helping and this literally sucks. When I was younger I barely got cramps but recently it's getting worse and worse. They hurt so bad"

If cramps are getting progressively worse, you may want to talk to your doctor, especially if they are becoming severe enough to interfere with your daily activities.

- Kit

Anonymous said, "I'm freaking out cause I just got a yeast infection for the 2nd time in 2 months &I take very good care of my hygiene (no douching) &eat healthy. My doc last time said it's normal if I'm on the pill but twice in 2 months?? I know that the meds to get rid of them isn't good for you if you take it often & idk what to do. I also was told by my nurse cousin that every 5 months I should take a month off the pill. Is that true? I'll talk to my doc before I do but I'm just curious if others heard that."

First of all, I feel it’s most important to address that your cousin is FULL OF SHIT, and she should not SHARE THAT KIND OF FUCKING FALSE INFORMATION because it’s going to HURT SOMEONE. There’s no such thing as taking a month off of birth control. It doesn’t change a goddamn thing.

And you’re doctor’s right, it’s normal. (Wow, it’s almost like they went to school for like 8 years for this or something). And the medication isn’t bad for you. Did your nurse cousin also share this with you? It’s just a simple anti-fungal and as long as you use it exactly as instructed and ALWAYS finish the dose, it’s harmless.

- Kit

p.s. seriously, tell your cousin a girl on the internet told her to go fuck herself. she’s a fucking nurse, she should fucking know better.

Anonymous said, "No I have the same thing as the other anon with the dark spots like not in my armpit but where my bra ends and they don't really hurt they're just kinda dark but it's annoying"

Skin discoloration, I believe, is just from being repeatedly exposed to friction and pressure.

- Kit

1 day ago · 1 note

Anonymous said, "About the bra anon- if the wire does touch your armpit what does it mean, too big? Because my left boob is a D, and the underwire doesn't poke, but my right boob is a solid C and the underwire drives me crazy and leaves bruises. The band also bunches on that side and I have legit red marks everyday from it."

It means the cup is too big and/or the band is too small. Maybe try keeping the D cup but going up a band size.

- Kit

1 day ago · 0 notes

Anonymous said, "Kits response to the "my best friend is going down a hard road" anon was freaking amazing. I don't know why it touched me, but way to go, Kit. That was some powerful and amazing shit."

Thanks, boo! It really just comes from experience. And a psychology undergrad with clinical training. But really, experience.

- Kit

1 day ago · 0 notes

Anonymous said, "I'm not sure what to do. My best friend that I have known since 2nd grade has started doing drugs, hanging out with bad people, let her grades drop from what she would use to get, and is now has had sex. She's 15, and she's complete different around me then other people. With others she's cussing a lot more, being rude to a lot of people, and smoking or whatever and with me she is as I've always known her. I love her to death and will be there for her, but I don't want her to make bad decisions"

I’m going to sound like a really boring and totally unempathetic adult here who just came out of the womb 20 years old and never experienced true adolescence, much like how you probably feel about your parents (but they were born 40), but: it’s a phase. I swear to God. Something about teenagers and noncomformity. They think they’re absolutely invincible, and they want to create this very “cool” identity that is nothing like them. This identity also often includes risky behavior.

Honestly, all you can do for now is keep being her friend. You don’t have to support her habits— in fact, it’s best if you don’t— but don’t give her the lectures and the scorn. Just change the subject and ignore it. If you really have to talk about it, just tell her you really care about her. Don’t tell her that it’s bad, don’t tell her that it’s going to get worse, don’t tell her that you’re worried about her; just that you care. All the aforementioned things tend to kind of put people on the defense. Make sure she understands that you’re still on her side, but you’re not going to encourage or engage in her behaviors.

Of course, if there comes a point when she is in danger, you should tell her parents. This would be: drinking to black out, especially in dangerous situations with people that aren’t necessarily going to look out for her. Hard drugs; I’m talking prescription pills, cocaine, heroin, whatever the fuck weird Tylenol mixtures kids are doing these days (I’m out of high school, I have no idea what teenagers do to get high anymore). I’m gonna go ahead and put salvia on that list too, because if someone actually willingly does salvia more than maybe 3 or 4 times, there’s probably an issue (it’s horrible). Unprotected sex, risky behaviors such as driving under the influence, etc etc. I think you get the idea. In those circumstances, tell her parents or a school counselor. Honestly, if they can’t curb her behavior, I don’t think calling the police when you know she’s doing something illegal would be completely wrong. In the end, it’s what will help her to get help (especially with drugs).

- Kit

Anonymous said, "So I may be a squirter. I noticed in the past few days and today my FWB said I had just squirted. Thing is whenever I see squirting theres like a ton that comes out whereas I dont have as much as them. Could it be squirting or just a lot of cum?"

Squirting in porn is actually pretty unrealistic. With most women, it’s more like a gushing sort of thing. Not so much a stream as it is like a little vagina waterfall.

- Kit

1 day ago · 0 notes

Anonymous said, "yo. so bras right. okay so i have these like dark sopts where the wire of my bras touches my armpit. they hurt and are gross to look at. what are they? how do i get rid of them?"

Your bra wire shouldn’t be in your armpit! A well fitting wire will stop just past the root of your breast.

To get rid of them, honestly, I would recommend changing bras, maybe even sticking to sports or wireless bras for a while. They sound like bruises.

- Kit

1 day ago · 0 notes

Anonymous said, "ok so I have these idk pimples on my butt? they feel like pimples but they don't have a white head on them. I'm thinking they are ingrown hairs. any ways to deal with these ugly blemishes?"

Yo, I too have bumps on my butt. They’re not ingrown hairs, I genuinely think they’re a type of acne. Mine cleared up a lot once I started using anti-acne body wash, so you may try that.

- Kit

1 day ago · 2 notes