Thiiiiiiiis week we review my favorite water-based lube, Sliquid H2O at Oh Joy, Sex Toy!
It has been pointed out to me that Sliquid Sassy is a good water-based anal lube, so feel free to ignore my line about sticking to silicone for butt play. As with all of our reviews, we talk just about our own personal experiences, though of course there are alternatives and different points of view to everything we discuss and try out. Our word is not law, thank god ;)
This is the lube I use! :) I love it! I might also try Sliquid Silk down the road if I can find someone who sells it in store.
I don’t think this is uncommon, and can happen with guys who aren’t “big” either. Your genitals can be sensitive after sex, even though that’s what they’re made for! My boyfriend is very average but we have sex infrequently- as a result, whenever we get the chance to have sex more than one day in a row, I often hurt after the first day, and sometimes after just an hour. I think it’s just a lack of practice.
So maybe this gives you an excuse to take it easier, but more frequently. ;)
Talking about it openly with your partner is definitely an excellent first step! Also, it’s totally okay that you backed out, and I’m really happy that your boyfriend seems to be very understanding and patient. My best advice is to let it happen organically- As in, don’t plan on a certain time and place to have sex, just let it happen whenever it happens. Maybe you guys making out on the couch, cuddling in bed, at a time when you are already aroused and don’t feel any pressure to go through with it. And maybe it doesn’t happen the first few times you try- you panic and back out. That’s totally fine. It’s about doing it when YOU feel ready, comfortable, and relaxed.
When it comes to the actual act, maybe have some lube on hand, as you’ll probably be tight and have less natural lubrication than usual because of nerves. I really recommend being in a position where YOU control how much of him goes in- On top is best for this. That being said, if you trust him to be gentle and slow as well as listen to you, you can also do it with him on top. Take deep breaths and don’t think too much about the act- Think about how much you care for your partner, and what a wonderful and beautiful thing it is to be that physically close to each other.
You’ve probably heard that for some women, the first time can be painful, and this is true. But more likely than not, you’ll feel a pinching sensation, and then some discomfort for just a couple of minutes. The longer you go with him inside of you, the more comfortable you’ll get with the idea and hopefully you’ll loosen up a bit.
If your first time doesn’t go perfectly (as first times are wont to do), don’t fret! Almost no one has that perfect, seamless, romantic first time. And remember that you don’t owe anyone anything- If at any point you want to stop, girl you stop that situation in its tracks.
Be safe, and best of luck! We’re all very happy for you!
Yes! Your cervix changes positions depending on where you are in your cycle. It drops and rises as well as tilts and dilates (only slightly!). Very astute of you to notice, my friend.
Can I bring this back? I wanna bring this back. :) TMI tuesday for any of us mods! bring your craziest questions, sweeties~
Holla. I’ve been having period farts bad enough to chase my boyfriend out of the room.
Nah, you’re not alone. I can’t feel my boyfriend at all lying down on our sides with him behind me, and I can only barely feel him on top unless I’m really riding and grinding. I think it has to do with penis/vagina shape, and length. As for feeling all of him: nope! The vaginal canal itself has few nerves, and the most sensitive spots are the entrance, g-spot, cervix, pretty much. You’re totally normal.
(2) He also ALWAYS keeps his phone face down and is weird about letting me see who he texts. I constantly worry he’s cheating with that behavior but I don’t know how to handle it tactfully without getting upset. He claims he isn’t. Any advice? :(
In my opinion, the best thing to do in these situations is to calmly but very directly address the problem and your concerns. Let him know that you trust him and love him and support him, but that his behaviour has seemed unlike his usual self, and a little abnormal. You just want to be open and honest with each other, and would like to not keep secrets. Ask him to be open with you about the texts, and say you’d like him to share some of the posts with you, so you can look at them together. Try to make this a shared activity instead of an accusation, because you want to show that you’re not accusing him of lying or anything.
If you feel he is still reluctant or the texts he shows you make you uncomfortable, then address that next. Let him know that the way he talks to these people makes you feel a little uncomfortable, and that you would appreciate if he did not text them directly. If you explain that it is just a matter of your personal comfort and boundaries, he should be understanding.
I know that there are many communities of “secret sharing” like Whisper (ie. Postsecret, which I love to death) that are very good at bringing strangers together in a sharing way, and not necessarily an intimate way. I’ve seen that it’s a good support group for many people who share these secrets or comment on them. I say this because it might be that this is what he uses it for, but feels a little embarrassed. Try to find out what he’s trying to get out of the app before getting too caught up in an argument. :)
Does anyone else have any advice?
Best of luck sweetie,
What you’re doing is not wrong at all. You’re enjoying yourself, you’re making money… And it’s a lot safer than being a prostitute or a stripper because you’re not in the physical presence of anyone else (not that there’s anything wrong with any other type of sex work either). As long as you’re not using your real name or giving out any personal info, and possibly blocking your IP address so that viewers can’t find out where you live (idk if that’s an actual issue, maybe a follower does) then you’re not doing anything wrong.
If you’re afraid of someone you know finding out, you could maybe conceal your identity? Like you could only show yourself from the neck down, or you could wear a pretty Venetian mask or something. Followers let us know if you have any experience/tips for her!
Could it be a bug bite? Spiders don’t discriminate for body parts, man, they’re fearless. I would go to the doctor if it continues another couple days, and in the meantime try to avoid scratching or irritating the bump. But do see a physician if you’re worried!
Believe me when I say that lighting makes all the difference. Schools tend to use cheaper fluorescent lighting, and it gives a yellower hue. It definitely has the tendency to make you look like a dying corpse…I just learned not to look too long in school mirrors. You’re there to learn and be with your friends, so focus on that. ;)
You don’t have to wear any makeup you don’t want to. If your skin starts looking worse at home, then that might be something to look for, your acne might be coming back in that case. But you’re fine, dear <3
The difference probably has to do with lighting. I know that I have poor lighting in my bedroom, but once I look at myself in the mirror when I get to work I’m like “wow, so that’s what my face looks like today. Ok that’s cool I guess.”
I totally get what you mean with red, uneven skin tone. If you don’t want to wear foundation every day, you can go with a tinted moisturizer instead. Especially during the winter (if you live in the northern hemisphere) it’s always good to give your skin that extra moisture, and it has sheer coverage as well so it will help even out your skin tone without looking cakey. It feels really light, just like regular lotion.
You can also get a green or yellow concealer and put that over the red spots on your face. I have a green concealer stick from Maybelline that I like to put on my chin, around my nose, and over any zits I might have. Then, because the green doesn’t blend in all the way, I use another concealer over it that matches my skin tone. It really helps cover up the redness. But, like I said, you can use yellow too, which blends better with most skin colors.
But don’t forget that you’re a lot harder on yourself than anyone else. Something that looks like a huge flaw to you could be something that no one else even notices, especially if it’s something you’re self-conscious about. I’m sure you look good no matter what!
I love it. My boyfriend and I sometimes stop right in the middle of changing positions to laugh at queefs. Queefs are natural. Queefs are hilarious. Accept the queef. Embrace the queef. Become the queef.
This sounds completely normal save for the red discoloration. Usually a bruise will remain in the purple, blue, green, and yellow range of color. I would wait a couple of days to see if the color changes with healing, and then definitely see a physician.
Also, be sure to tell your boyfriend that tits are not fucking stress balls! How would he like it if you squeezed the everloving shit out of his nuts? I mean, unless you’re into that, which is totally fine and no judgment, but please be careful! Kinks are not worth permanent bodily harm!
I’m from the UK but i think i can safely say they will test for men too!
After all there is literally zero logic in a organisation for sexual health only testing one half of the population!
First of all, I’m so glad that you’re encouraging him to get an STD test as well as getting one yourself. A lot of people think about birth control but they forget about protecting against STDs, and a lot of people are afraid to ask their partner to get tested, so you’re flippin’ awesome.
Your guy can definitely get tested at Planned Parenthood. They offer lots of services to men, including STD tests, cancer screening, and general checkups. As for pricing, you’ll have to contact your local center to see what your cost would be. It depends a lot on what state you’re in, what your income is, etc. It could cost anywhere from $50-$200. You can click here to find your local PP to see what they offer and what to expect, but like I said, you’ll have to call them for pricing.
Hey from my experience tampons get hella hard to remove when they aren’t saturated enough, so like, they’re expanded but pretty dry! My suggestion is to just use a smaller absorbancy! Hopefully that should work!
I’m sure in a panic and if its rly stuck lube probably (might?!) help!