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Disclaimer: Medical advice given on this blog is not meant to replace professional information from a healthcare specialist.

Anonymous said, "I have acne on my crotch. Is that normal? How do i get rid of it? Would it help if i shaved my pubic hair all gone? I don't like wearing bikini's anymore because i'm scared it'll ride up and people will see! HELP! :S"

Oh for chrissakes no don’t shave it all it’ll only make it so much worse

Some people are prone to acne in that area, especially since it contains so many sebaceous glands compared to other parts of the body. You may try an acne body wash, but I would also think it would be a good idea to bring it up with your doctor (or a dermatologist, if you can).

- Kit



Anonymous said, "Okay so there's this girl I find attractive, and wouldn't mind trying things with. But she's been hanging with a friend and her friend is a "hoe" and I'm pretty sure she's picking up her friends actions. How should I handle this situation?"

First: Wow, please don’t call anyone a hoe. Ever. At all. Even “in quotations.” Just please don’t. It’s a word used (among MANY) to shame women for having lots of sex or sex at all. That’s not fair, it’s not nice, don’t do it. Let everyone have as much or as little sex as they want, date as many or as few people. Yeah? Yeah. Okay, moving on.

You are not responsible for your friend’s behaviour, and much as you might dislike it, what she does is her choice. She gets to choose how to live her life, just like you get to choose how you live yours. Here’s a link to an amazing ask Kit answered that I can never live up to, so just read that one. She said everything I want to say anyways. :)

-Plethorian 


11 hours ago · 4 notes

Anonymous said, "i have a common but frustrating whine :( i can't orgasm and it's soooo annoying, like i can get myself to a point where i feel like it's so intense that i can't keep going but i don't ever feel like i've crossed any sort of orgasmic threshold or anything :/ and on top of that i have a harmless but irritating heart condition (i've been diagnosed) that seems to crop up whenever i'm masturbating and it's really distracting and throws me off. sometimes having a vagina is a pain in the ass sigh"

All I can say really is practice makes perfect. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself, either- that’s not going to help your orgasms or your heart condition. Give yourself a break! Your body’s trying its best, so just show it some love and a pat on the back(/vagina). :)

-Plethorian


11 hours ago · 0 notes

Anonymous said, "so im 15 and theres this guy i like that is 19 but hes turning 20 in a couple of months. im pretty sure he likes me to becuase he always talks to me and hugs me and opens car doors for me, hes just really cute but one problem is that hes my brothers best friend. he would probably be angry he found us dating (but were not) but my question is that can a 15 year old date am almost 20 year old?"

Legally? Yes. Can you have sex legally? Not if you live in the US. Would it be wise to date a 20 year old? I personally do not think so. As someone who is currently 20 and was once 15, and also dated a 20 year old when she was 15, I really wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. It’s not that either person is wrong or bad, it’s just that where a 15 year old is emotionally and where a 20 year old is emotionally are worlds apart. They’re both very emotionally immature and vulnerable in very different ways.

This question really hit home for me because just a couple of weeks ago I visited my SO’s family and spent a few hours with his 15 year old little sister, and WOW I TELL YOU WHAT 15 and 20 is a huuuuuuuuuge gap. This girl is worried about how she’s going to hide her Kool-Aid dyed hair tips when color guard practice starts up again and if she and her boyfriend will last through the summer, and I’m worried about how I’m going to pay for my car, when the Hell I’m gonna finally move out, if my current relationship is “the one” and what am I really doing with my life anyway am I a failure everyone else is better at college than me oh god please etc.

And I’m not saying that her problems aren’t important. I’ve been there, I know they are incredibly big deals to her. But the fact of the matter is, what a 15 year old wants/needs out of a relationship is veeeerry different from what a 20 year old wants/needs. 15 year olds are just experimenting, and have those flings of infatuation and their exciting and awkward new sexual experiences and like to hold hands in the hallway. As you reach your early twenties, it’s kind of the time relationships get “serious” and you both have jobs and college and everything in life is terribly uncertain and you want someone that can emotionally support you and be your best friend.

Plus, you should probably respect your brother’s feelings on this, because family is way more important than crushes and really short-lived relationships, you feel me? And you wouldn’t want your brother to lose his best friend over this. Best friends are important.

- Kit



Anonymous said, "Okay let's just say I'm a young girl, but my boyfriend recently just broke up with me over text message! Things got really nasty fast and there was drama. But I can't stop thinking about him and our memories, he was the first guy I had sexual experiences with and now I'm just confused and hurt and I need help!"

Ahh, the first heartbreak. It just takes time to get over it, I swear. Try not to obsess and work on doing nice things for yourself that make you feel good.

- Kit



Anonymous said, "This might seem like an odd question, but just go with it. There is this guy I know, and he's 21. However, he still look like he's what, fifteen? No facial hair, no chest hair, very boyish body... When are boys fully grown? Will he live forever without facial hair, and with the body of a seventeen year old, or is he still growing?.. I swear to God I've had sex-ed, but I just don't get this."

Men and women don’t usually reach the end of their hormonal development until around 25. But it’s very common for many men to never have high testosterone levels, or particularly traditionally “masculine” features. Everyone comes in all shapes and sizes.

- Kit



Anonymous said, "My mom was just diagnosed with a terminal illness and given 2 months to live. I am beyond distraught. Her and I would always go on Sephora shopping sprees, ride around together, and she'd take me to Atlanta all the time bc she knew I loved the city. She was the best mother to me and I feel like I didn't appreciate it and I was always short with her. I feel so guilty for not always being nice to her. I don't think I can live with myself after she passes."

She isn’t dead yet, you still have her and you need to make the most of that, if you feel anything like that you need to tell her and if you feel you need to appologise verbally do it now, though i promise you she will laugh and tell you not to be silly because she loves you and thats what mums do! 

You have a time frame to do as much as you can do whatever that is that she wants. From anyone i was close to that died, my main though is I wish i could have told them explicitly how i felt and asked them explicitly anything they wanted me to know.

You have the time, do it now and dont linger on your sadness she is still here, you can also talk to her about that if you need - how does she want you to live for the rest of your life, whats her big advice for you, how does she want her Final Party to be like, does she maybe want a living funeral?

Ask all the questions so neither of you feel regretful or guilty, there is no reason to when you have the time, its tempting to mourn now you know what will happen but you can save excess sadness after because right now i’m sure its your mum more than anything that needs the cheering.

~Trip



Anonymous said, "I work at a hospital (training to be an oncologist) and today was the first time I had to tell a a woman and her husband she has pancreatic cancer and 6 months to live. I didn't think it would ever be as hard as it was. Giving the news that's ending a life and destroying another. Does it get easier over time, or so I just need to get thick skin and cold now?"

Its one of those things, from what i understand, that you will get used too. Whether you get used to it now and grow some thick skin, or if you want to just get used to it over time is up to you i think.

Its ultimately about letting go - even now, you have no control over this out come, there is nothing you could do or else you’d be trying it. And on the other hand, what if you werent doing your job and she just experienced unmanaged pain as her time ticked down without being able to prepare her family et al?

I know your training but its better to experience this kind of thing earlier than later.

~Trip



Anonymous said, "My SO has recently put a pass code on his phone, tilts the screen away when he gets a text, or sometimes won't reply to a certain person or look at the message until I'm gone. Cellphones are honestly the bane of my relationship's existence, all the shifty behaviour that surrounds it is making me unnecessarily self-conscious, worried and jealous. :("

Ask him about it. Don’t waste your time and his by worrying away and having doubts and wrecking yourself. You deserve an answer, and you are not a bad girlfriend for being concerned about his behaviour. You’re allowed to ask, you’re allowed to look into any suspicious behaviour. Trust your gut, communicate. Set down rules for what is and is not okay. Tell him your feelings. Ask him to tell you what he’s feeling, what he’s thinking. Work together. Communicate.

-Plethorian



Anonymous said, "So, I live with my nan and while it's good most of the time, she takes literally nothing I say seriously. There's a huge crack across my ceiling that she's been lying about trying to get fixed for about 4 months, she talks about me going on birth control and then as soon as my period's over dismisses it as 'not that bad' (my cramps are significantly worse and I feel sick now) and we got into an argument where she essentially called me selfish for wanting to seek medical help for a suspected 1/2"

(2/2) for a suspected broken wrist. I get frequent panic attacks but because I can hide them well and they don’t often happen around her, she says it’s just because I don’t have a job and i don’t feel confident enough to go to a doctor without her. Do you have any advice?

Honestly, just don’t listen to her. I know she’s your nan, and I absolutely believe you should have respect for your family, but if she’s giving you poor advice about your health and it’s causing you physical or mental pain, that’s not okay. This is the moment when you need to take responsibility for your own health and life and Be An Adult. (Long answers, go below the cut!)

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Anonymous said, "I just recently started taking multi vitamins with iron, can they mess with my period? In the 9 years I've been getting my period they've never been more than a couple days ahead/behind but never five days."

You’re fine. Vitamins and iron won’t touch your hormones. Also your uterus is not a machine, your period gonna change.

-Plethorian



Anonymous said, "I'm 19, almost 20, and I am not on birth control, nor do I plan to be. I just don't want to take in more hormones that my body doesn't really need. But I do want to become more sexually active. In the past, I've relied on condoms and Plan B (twice), but I want to be safer. My options include the IUD and diaphragm. Do you or anyone else have any insight/history with this methods, or perhaps another method that doesn't rely on hormones? Thanks!"

(FYI, birth control means any contraceptive method, not just ones that use hormones! So you know. And it’s not recommended to use Plan B as anything but emergency birth control - the more you take it, the higher the total pregnancy rate)

I have heard excellent things about the IUD! My friend has it, because hormonal birth control was giving her mood swings and nausea. It should be noted though, that it’s her personal experience. I’ve been on the shot (hormonal) for about a year now and I’m a-okay! 

You should ask your doctor about the IUD first though, because it does present a problem for those who have a heavy blood flow or other complications with their regular period- because there’s no hormones, it doesn’t regulate or stop your period, and if you have a very heavy flow + have issues like anemia etc., then you’ll need to take extra precautions for those things. 

Regardless, I’d ask your doctor what they recommend. Every birth control method is different and come with a different set of cautions and possible effects on you. Also, don’t discount hormonal birth control! I know it sounds scary, but it’s not “more than you need.” The hormones that are in such methods are not just extra that they stick in you - they serve a very specific purpose, and are pain-stakingly measured in exact doses according to what they are meant to do. For example, some pills have more or less hormones than others, and different kinds. I tried a lower-dose pill for a while when it was suspected that a higher-dose pill was giving me issues (tl;dr problem wasn’t the hormones). Your doctor will only prescribe your a hormonal birth control whose dose is appropriate for your needs.

Doctors, they’re great! Chat ‘em up!

-Plethorian



Anonymous said, "Hey ladies. I went on a date with a girl last night. We ended up drinking quite a bit and it led to her fingering me. And I just feel really weird about it today. Not like violated, but like I don't know why I did that. And I'm realizing that she likes me quite a bit more than I like her, and that I don't think I want to see her anymore. I've just felt really uncomfortable all day whenever I think about it. But I don't know what to do."

I’m sorry that ended up happening, that super sucks. :( I hope the uncomfortableness passes - time does tend to heal most things.

As to the girl, I’d just tell her honestly that you’re not interested in continuing the relationship in any way. You can wait till you’re ready, but I absolutely think the sooner the better. 

Take care and stay safe,

-Plethorian



Anonymous said, "After me and my boyfriend broke up I felt like I could breath again then I started to think what if I never find a guy that will love me again? I suffer from skin discoloration and on top of that I have stretch marks my ex never judged me for it but I'm afraid someone new will I'm afraid of love but I want love if that makes sense I want nothing more in life than to have a family but doubt it because I have these ugly problems with my body."

Right, let me tell you the thing. 

You don’t want the love of people who judge you. It’s like wanting a cactus to hug you. No. You don’t want that. You want good people to love you.

If people judge you or are upset about your skin, if people think your physical appearance is a determinant of who you are, that it matters more than your feelings, then you don’t want those people

Go find the good people in life, the people who are smart enough to love you entirely, skin discolouration and all. They exist, and you’d be really stupid to think they didn’t (I’m one of the people!)

P.S. Every human being has stretch marks. It’s how fat lives on your body. Don’t blame fat for being fat. That’s mean.

-Plethorian



Anonymous said, "The all girls school anon: I go to an all girls school in SC and will be a senior. it can be lonely sometimes. Really just going out and doing things is a great way to meet other people. All you have to do is have a little confidence and you'll meet some great people"

1 day ago · 0 notes
#Anonymous